spending is finally an option in my daily what to do list.

a shoppg list has been conjured;
- pair of hot black jeans
- sexy vans slip ons
- short sleeve shirt
- nice new buckled belt
- tons of polo tees

its like 19 days to my birthday; gosh, im finally going to be 18!
where im officially an ADULT. haha. at least in my family I am.
i didn't think of coming out with a birthday wants list but, material and superficial gift aint the best presents but its the wishes and concerns that is the most important. but u would, im babbling, i OF COURSE WANT GIFTS.
im nothing but MATERIAL =)

yep so, heres one splendid wanna do list;
OPTION A:
a nice chalet to celebrate if im financially strong enough.

OPTION B:
a nice lunch & dinner at restaurants and eventually spending a nice evening at esplanade.

OPTION C:
a fuckg terrible day at school with tons of science stuff to worry about. =(

of course, i would choose OPTION B. anyone wanna date me?

alright, enough about that, shall continue with an interesting news about the LTA.
&& LTA= Land Transport Authority.
dont turn off yet, this is just getting interesting, i heard that they are allowing car owners to customise their car plate, so, instead of the boring, SGH 3765 H thingys. we could make ours unique, like, HOTSHIT or HANDSOME. cool right?
car owners, start saving your pockets. =)

i love you the way you are, not the mask that you are putting up now.
remove them. take it away. take it that im begging you. change or it would consume you.
right, hate me.

nothings worse than being stabbed in the back. but however, being doubted by someone you classify under best friends. perhaps would be the worse case of treachery. i call it total FARKED Up.

when you needed a shoulder or a helping hand, i was always there to pull u up and bring you to your senses, when it comes to my affairs, u dismiss them as issues of immaturity. speaking of which, forgive me for being blunt, but ain't u the immature one, always having that assumption that being drunk is better than sober? escaping the reality? OH WTF? is that how 18 year old deals with their problems? or rather, in your perspective, an ADULT? hmm, that is such a concept you have in your yellow-strawed brains,( are they even brains to begin with? ). your mundane and abnormal life, is it even worth mentioning? oh perhaps you thought that yours is a jewel among the gossips. but heck no, who gives a fark about you? no one? even people say you looked odd/weird which is a rather interesting way to describe an abnormal person like you. well, abnormal adjectives fits the bill. stop avoiding the inevitable, once gone just leave it, oh, wait, absolute power corrupts absolutely? you think by having a knack for an unrecognized sport could feed you forever? oh please, wake up your ideas, you ain't any international super freak, if thats what they are calling this days. your skills are just far below mediocre, and please, don let your ego take you.

i don't want to say all these. just simply one word. bye

significant/insignificant.
sightful/insightful.

what else can i still mull about in this mundane life of mine.
yet it was just today i make this mundane and boring life seemingly interesting.
first, making a fiasco of an already ending relationship.
gave lots of wrong orders that resulted in a feast after work.
make mega vocal laughters that made everyone notice me.
starting to grow hatred for some of my colleagues. and of course favour!

did i mention before the people at my workplace are funny?
here are some of the taglines:

1) eh eh, the guest wave to get your attention so long that his armpit hair fell off

2) there were some condiments and display on the table and upon realising their loss, i questioned my colleague about it location; .... ohh the guest took it home.

3) the two renowned and lao jiaos uncles kept singing and talking to themselves.

4) ge tai singers.. people who frequently sing to themselves.. and so loud that the members ask, are they paid for being a band?

cant remember but all i know, the people there are murderously funny and crazy and insane. you just cant curb your laughter. hoo hoo.

there are just so many thoughts/issues i intend to pen down, but its just too much and a hassle.

i shall just find another day and time to organise them and write them down. kuddos ppl.

seriously.
the times in GYSS were really fun.
can be seen from all the testimonials. was like spending some [s]boring[/s] quality time reading. and was like laughing all the way.
testimonials from joel, jinx, elana, kenneth lim, not to forget the ah go go, kaixin, and all the many others. freaking hilarious.
im seriously missing the times in GYSS, although now, there are no more reasons to go back, as tiney has graduated and so did clair,min,ben,faris they all. no one's there to receive us.
oh, did i mention i'm officially part of GYSS again?
im now part of the alumni in the executive committee. its my turn to serve the school and return my knowledge to help those ignorant kids.
alright, shall go off now.
theres nothing much i want to say already.

im still disappointed in you.

people i wanna meet up really soon;
gwen
farm
heng
ruby
blah blah

call me up soon.

this sure sounds funny; i woke up, when to the toilet to shit and saw a fluttering moth, struggling, then while i was staring and half the time trying to whip it away from me, i pondered, wouldn't be so cruel to just drain the life out of that poor thing, because of an immediate fear? so i stopped and thought about this, everyone's disliked topic but needed more information,which is..
the afterlife.
which many ponders, and fear. initially everything was blank and dark, nothing, till the day our parents brought us here. from that particular moment we were given thoughts, minds, feelings. so how would the afterlife be like?

im not ashamed to say that this is my perhaps is my number one fear after heights. cos if u throw me off 25th floor, i think i wouldn't die from falling but fright. and back to the topic, its not that moment when the death angels take you, sapp the life out of you ( is THERE EVEN such a person??) then again, it leads to a faith and trust to your own religion.

once i heard from this amazing person, your afterlife is decided yourself, whether are you muslim, christian, buddhist? you would meet the respective god and all end up in 'paradise' then again, is there sufficient space in paradise? hell? i mean, all these are hypothetical. no one could come back from the dead to tell us.

each of our own religions has their own set of miracle stories. and heres one, on my previous and rare(im so guilty) visit to church, and i heard from this person;
i was on the operation table and everything seemed delirious, and i seemed to have woken up but not felt any pain, i raised higher and higher, till i saw the blazing lights to heaven's gates. i saw jesus, and he told me, my time is not up yet but yet, my sheer appearance mocked the beauty of heaven and i know that in the years to come when its time, i would be able to come up here to enjoy.....

as a Christian, and a fellow believer has experienced such a thrilling tale, which most in their life would never encounter, must definitely believe in it, but then again, who is there to verify? or is this another stale attempt at a shot to fame?

since life is short, fragile and weak.. we on our own can make it to the fullest potential. giving this body, the best chance to shine.. and not having any regrets.. so, at least now im abiding this very famous saying. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
make sure that we used do our very best in every part of your life, telling your loved ones how much you loved them, and your friends, how much you treasured them and in everything you do, so not only for yourself but know that your friends/family are just a step behind you.

this is perhaps my last mode of medium to tell you, **********
that its really time to wake up. i dont know what you think of me and i dont care, cos all i actually care is to change you, and not indulge in the stupid things you do, you are seriously immature in your thinking, being an 18, always boasting about your age and everything but in fact, do you act as your age?absolutely not. you have no farking concern for you school, you gave to regard and make it your best to finish every single cent in your account. i know, till this point, if you are reading, u are definitely damn pissed up and wondering what position am i in to say this.. thats simply because, i still regard you as my best friend, and till the day when you loathe me for not engaging in your same interest. then, im telling you, im still standing on my views, continuously changing you. i hope one day, you have sufficient karma to let it save your own life.

work was hell. i scalded my third and fourth finger. and cut on my last. and was busy and mad during work. shan't elaborate, ain't a pretty experience.

alright, i think its time to sleep. 4.11am and weihow's got a date with his dream mates.

and one last enjoyment for you guys:
a real famous and touching poem; by Mary Stevenson
entitled: Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with the LORD.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.

He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.

He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he
questioned the LORD about it:

"LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."

The LORD replied:

"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

relationships,
fragile as they are. bonded as they could be. forged by the many branches that makes up the tree of love.

a typical case study:
a certain random: i would love you till the day i die
a certain random's gf: ohh.. me too.
*getting all affectionate and touchy...

** yet a few days later, they broke up..
so, what is everlasting love? true love? everyone ponders; this is of course a controversial issue where there are many sided views.
Of course, you might say how true love happens when somebody see through your imperfections and accept them for who you are. Well, truth be told, the more imperfections you have, the more likely you'll end up still being a lao ti koh in your mid 40s with nothing but a old ugly dog to accompany you and lick your decaying toenails.

to any ah pek ah mao on the street, definitely, savoring the feeling of being loved is easy, but could love only be a one sided affair? where only one party is sustaining it? well, i would say love is a journey (and pls, this is not any yahoo/google, search engine answer, though it would be a good idea to get some inspiration there..) where it is smooth sailing at one and hiccups the other. but wouldn't all these make one stronger? when upon arriving at the final destination, which might be marriage/death, one could emerge to be a stronger and better being?

love i would say is also a pursuit. an endless one, some where one cannot stop but be greedy for more. and it eventually becomes something that we can no longer achieve/reach which is most probably the reason why couples break up, as when u are more into the relationship, be it the duration,bond.. the expectation to the other party gradually increases and when failure to keep up, leads to unhappiness and finally separation.

LOVE in my era is generally expressed through BGR, 'friends' become exceptionally sweeter/romantic and more physical. why 'friends'? well, in short, how many people actually treasure their spouse? either they two time, or for sex, others etc etc. the value and meaning is thus lost. bringing a new definition and term to BGR, Boy Girl inteRcourse OR Boy GIRLS race, this has what BGR turned into, no more romance, love, sincerity..


Nothing's perfect. Not even love. Yes, we can aim for perfection, but even so, it's almost always near perfect. We all love our partners to say and do sweet nothings for us. We expect them to do this and do that and when they don't, we get dissapointed. Turns out that we have become an addict of romance and not of love any more. So I'm not asking for an ideal relationship, for the other half that completes me. I'm tired of waiting or looking for him. But instead, if someone speical comes along..someone who gives me warmth, who gives me tenderness once in a while then I'm contended

and LOVE has become, Lust Ovulation Vast Erotic.
figure it out yourself. love has been demeaned in our society. well, not saying that i have treated love in a respectable manner but i have at least changed, and hope u people who are guilty of such acts. jolly well.. know what you should do.

on a contrary, a different subject, i found out that my job, is far more interesting and enjoyable that i had expected.. no more dreading the hours there. high/low pay does not matter as long as u enjoyed urself. thats the most impt..

last but not least, about masks,looks,appearances, Some people show off in a certain manner because they want the world to see it. Others try to hide their origin because they want the world to see something else. But I'm hoping that someone would see everything in me. From how disorganised I am, to how idealistic I get at times. It's something that everyone is guilty of. and im sure of it, why? people aint proud of themselves,or they want to follow the trend, one simple example. last time in spore, its hokkien ah beng/lians. now, its ah moh bengs/lians, its a pseudo culture. people change to portray themselves in the manner which is highly respected which is currently, the english language, useful as it is, powerful as it becomes a bench mark. people who cant speak or cant string a sentence for nuts are almost rejected, becoming the rock bottom of the society, or becoming the rejects and those with high ability are always associated with good ENGLISH speakers. and these are the real arrogant ones, working in the club, im constantly exposed to such people, for fark sake la, if you have been highly educated, you should more knowledgeable and not stuck ups, if thats what the universities are teaching nowadays, but heck no, kindly shed of the disgusting image and rotten sour face of yours, else, you shan't gain/go further in life.

hmm, off to bed now, working tmr. =)

work's fine. a little more than i have expected. more crowd, speed and haste is necessary. been feeling rather down and lethargic. perhaps with my many heart wrenching and worrysome affairs. i cant help but crying out loud for someone to lead and shine my path again.

im definitely not mentioning anything much here since there are prying eyes and immature mindsets. people who knows me well should know.

money. it breaks friendships, neh, relationships in general. there are far to many incidents/coincidences/case studies or sayings to prove it. well, indeed, money is the root of all greed. thats why even people like me, work non stop, knowing that there is already sufficient, but our bank accounts/expenditure is like a hollow vacuum, thinking that you already have money and before a blink of an eye, you lost it. thats makes money important, cos there is an infinite need for it. another cause would be the security, in our society, the kids like myself, have been brought up in too much luxury/posh environments. that the existence of money has already changed from, *** to be there as a medium for the exchange of product/services to a .. hmm. let me find a suitable phrase, prominent use, be it loan sharks/banking/investment/security***

back to money being a wrecker, since understanding its crucial/prime role in our life, it becomes important where we position the asset. in this case, among other parties/individuals. i cant say i was not a victim of this eventful case, but almost succumb to the loss of one best friend, nonetheless, the damage's been done, all i can say is, we can resume to the nearest possible stage of perhaps good friends. its just that particular feeling, that emptyness, that gives u the strength and dereliction to abandon all kinship/relationship to get the thing back to replace the space, that empty lot.

thats my piece for today.

im missing the good old days, when i sit in english lessons fantasize about litterbugs and killer litter. and bursting out laughing in school where no one thinks im some sorta freak. and commanding that particular level of respect.

but definitely not the good old HAIR, not the all spiked up like durians but the amazing mushrooms. which share some severe resemblance to the toadstools u see in the early dawn morning. neither the FOX/giordano/or hell knows what other things i wore in the past, the awful cannot make it dress sense.

with every step u take, there are bound to be things that u lose, gain. but make the best of it to retain and improve the old and gain new stuff at the same time, or else, u will be a stick in the mud, never improving till the day u leave to meet jesus.

on a separate note, im seriously exhausted, but i refuse to leave msn now. i can chat/catch up with the ones i miss. sometimes i really take my hat off to see my commitment, so proud of myself...... awww... (in a dream).. and smacks... okay, back. shall go off now.

its final.
im working.
earning my own bit of share.
tanglin club.
would not be blogging for some time.
take care.

shall update everything at one go, since now i got the mood to do so; so, people, stay with me. and prepare mugs and pails, cause you are going to be laughing/crying and also, a mug to quench your thirst.

shall update about the funnest event in 2007.
26 to 28 february, the class which sticked together for 4 months. so much fun, jeering, laughter.
those three days. much planning by aqilah and farhan and boh, thanks to them for making this entire thing one major success!

let me jot those three fruitful days down.
DAY ONE:
went down to pasir ris to meet the peeps. was like mega late. as usual, haha so me and beatrice panic. walked there and met up with dennis and aqilah and farhan. soon joined by yy.
crystal and pen(non-class member) went to check in already.

and so, we walked to the chalet. was pretty disappointed and terrified. right in front of OCH and the entire landscape was not every inviting. but nonetheless, settled in and had fun packing and unpacking stuff. started to prepare the pit at 4 plus but the fire started only at 7 plus, thanks to those NTUC charcoals which was completely useless! the cooking was done by the chef. aqilah and the smell was so inviting! and all of us including the neighbourhood cats joined us. by that time, ben ,sharifah, kelvin and james arrived. nooh was as usual lost. and he finally found us 2 hours later.

...LMAO, the 23 bus stops joke.

WTF loh. damn ma de funny.

later, people started bathing and all the gurls together, shall not go into details. played poker, and LOST LIKE GOD KNOWS HOW MUCH, true/dare, not much of a dare, cause, u know, i know. we know. OCH, yep and had a sort of heart to heart talk and confession. KEPT WITHIN THE WALLS OKAY PEOPLE. when to CV(changi village) look at bapoks or whatever they are known as. and Pen as usual was making a HOLE scene. trying to agitate them but he escaped unscathed. walked along and was feeling of utmost discomfort cause of my throat and my fever, but continued on, din wanna spoil the mood and be a wet blanket,

hmm. IMMA SUPERHERO.

reached the destination and was playing games such as 007 and the many other hilarious and nerve wrecking games that causes you to erect, not the bottom one but erect straight in your sitting posture. play till dawn and began making our way back. wanted to run. and farhan was so sporting to accompany me along with qeelah and james and BEATRICE THE BABE, who, eh don see her ah lian/bimbo hor, she run ah, WAH KAO, we guys, stand back hor, DON PLAY PLAY.leaving boh and sharifah and the bimbo behind, poor things. haha. and wait i forgot the swing, we swing and swing until beatrice wan to vomit. and pen and ben almost broke the entire thing down. LMAO.

well, when all seems close to reaching back to our nest to rest and catch a wink, some asshole dogs decided that we were their playful prey and decided to give us a chase. and wtf la. i ran for my dear life and was dragging beatrice along. and we decided that we outran the dogs.

(was that even possible? those beast had four legs and horse power)

and as soon as i thought of it, BEATRICE THE BABE yelled so loud and everyone started running and dashing and i began running again. hell hath no fury, i ran for my dear ass life WITH BEATRICE. and managed to reach back in one single piece. tell you people, it was no easy feat.

ran like no one's business. and someone even said,
ehhh, weihow, next time your napfa put one dog to chase you and you can run very very fast. TAMADE.

DAY TWO:
actually, that was part of day two. so we slept and those wicked and malicious people said i snore. SAM, i know u are laughing. DAMN IT. haha. but, well, started awaking and arousing people, not sexual but arouse from their sleep and made our trip to CV to have lunch.

.... NASI LEMAK not open. those opened, the nasi tasted like. god knows what.

.... ALL GREASY FOOD. since at that point of time, most of us suffered from severe flu and sore throats, soups would come in useful but hell no, ate all those cha kway teow. greasy sinful, throat hurting food.

.... with kelvin around, nothing seemed fun anymore. haha. jkjk. he was a joy to have.

went back, DA PAO for the rest to makan den prepared for our water bombs. much as some of us did not want to get wet, ALL GOT WET. and we make a GARGANTUA mess out of the entire area. throwing here and there. and 1000 bombs we made, was not kua zhang, we meng throw for 5-10 mins and ALL GONE. so much much fun.

okay, prepared for the bbq and stuff. haha. and was having hell lots of fun eating and talking. with the companion of the two black cats, loitering around to pick some remains. and i fed them okay, THATS LIKE SO MEGA UBER KIND OF ME. as usual la. i do that all the time. 20 mins later... IM LIKE THE WORLD'S MORE CHARITABLE PERSON........ okay, i side tracked.

and are you people still hanging ON? well, u are reading the blog of the most popular person. and every scene involved me. so. haha, NO CHOICE. cant short cut ya know. =)

BBQ and fun and everything and i decided to head home. reasons? SERIOUSLY not feeling well and saw something tat i hoped and prayed and wished never to see again. HOME SWEET HOME

and I ALREADY MISS W26B. aww.


now i move on to something more significant. more recent. which is 3rd march and who's birthday, its weiting. (yawns, audience begin to whisper to each other... this is getting boring.. )

HEY, hell not alright. she has the most popular personS as her best buddy, namely me and christine. HAHA. heck la. (begins to whisper to each other... now its getting interesting.. FUN FUN) and so, we tricked her and almost people around her that, I WAS GOING FOR CAMP. and poor tingwei. was so upset and depressed and yes of course, bcos, im her ultra best friend, haha.

here goes: in short;
OUR PLAN:
ambush her at her block and present her with the photo collage and the cake. make her so shock that she drops everything and her jaws needs to be hand held.

RESULTS:
she was. hmmm, ultra uber shocked but not jaw dropping . she was so touched. and the three of us began taking pictures which till today, i have not seen the light of either of one. haha.

after the whole extravagance and as u all can see, it is short cut-ed cos, im getting tired and my hands are yelling. STOP STOP.


went out with myron and jaz to celebrate her birthday. and CHRISTINE CHOO MING LI AGUILERA was like so late that after we went home, she woke up. WTFFFFF. OMFG. WTH. went for my family dinner and was discussing my future career options..... A/B/C OR D? hmm.

alright. im gonna crash, goodnight

a rainy morning.
still suffering the aftermath of the chalet.
the surreal feeling is back.

nonetheless. my GPA for my entire year one is out.
okay, yes it is. those who have not gone to check, pls do.
eh, don start changing windows to myrp to find out.
stay with me a little while longer.
so here are the results of my year one in RP.

click on it to see a bigger view.
On a separate note;

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welcome to MY BLOG:D
Site: http://confused-delirium.blogspot.com


Since: 010306
Purpose: Whatever

RULES
screw those stupid rules

WEIHOW
darryl's my other name
16 April 1989
catholic high school
guangyang secondary school
serangoon junior college
republic polytechnic
email


WANTS
& touch screen hp
& g mask for my IPOD
& new converse sneakers
& guess buckle belt
& new adidas jacket(:
& vintage tops

(:

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History

! March 2006
! April 2006
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! January 2008